Before agreeing to host a party, it is very important to set party guidelines for your teens. There is often tremendous pressure to drink or use substances when hosting or attending a party. It is also an opportunity to show your kids that they can have fun in a healthy environment, free from alcohol and drugs.
In Minnesota it is illegal for an adult to provide alcohol to anyone (other than a parent to their own child) under 21 under any circumstances, even in your own home and even with the other parent’s permission. You face felony charges, fines and jail time.
Tips for Hosting Parties:
- Make the guest list. Plan for adequate supervision. If the party is going to be large, you may need other adults to help supervise.
- Decide where the party will be held. A party held in a basement family room will be easier to supervise than a party held outside in a large backyard.
- Discuss and agree on ground rules (e.g. no alcohol or drugs served or brought in, no leaving the party and returning, no uninvited guests, lights on, etc.)
- Be home during the entire party. Greet guests when they arrive and be on hand when they leave. Be alert to guests while serving refreshments.
- Secure any alcohol or prescription drugs in your home.
- End the party at the agreed upon time.
How to Handle Problems:
- Be alert for signs of use by teens. If a child is under the influence, notify their parents so they can arrange safe transportation home. Don’t let anyone drive under the influence.
- Ask guests to leave if they try to bring in alcohol or drugs or if they refuse to cooperate with your expectations. Don’t be afraid to call the police if needed.
When your teen has been invited to a party, ask questions and gather information: where will the party be, who is hosting, who will be there, how will they get to the party and home again, and the hours of the party.
Tips for Attending Parties:
- Call the parents to verify the location, that they will be present, to offer assistance and to be certain that alcohol and drugs will not be permitted.
- Plan for transportation home if your child wants to leave early for any reason. Tell your child you expect them to call you to pick them up if alcohol or drugs are available, if the host parent isn’t present, if any damage is being done, or if she or he is uncomfortable at all.
- Set a curfew. Stay awake until your teen comes home. Talk with them for a while before they go to sleep. It is a good idea to set your alarm for a few minutes after curfew so you will be aware if they miss curfew.
The University of Minnesota Extension has tip sheets and resources for parents including tips for hosting and attending parties.